Howdy there, Scream Freaks! If any of y’all were ’round to experience the ’90s, one of the biggest letdowns that decade was America’s blockbuster spin on one of Japan’s biggest properties, Godzilla. We here at Screaming Soup! always thought it was a fine movie overall, but we’re far from G-Man fanatics and credit that film’s rockin’ soundtrack for the majority of our fandom it earned. The die hard Godzilla fans, however, simply disliked the drastic change in the big guy’s design, felt he was stripped of all his kingly mannerisms includin’ his signature nuke breath, and hated how he died like a bitch from common army artillery.
It wasn’t ’til 2014 America got ‘nother swing at bringin’ the atomic lizard to the big screen and hit a lot closer to home. This time, the titular behemoth looked like Godzilla, stomped like Godzilla, and even fought other monsters of city crushin’ girth like Godzilla. The only sour for me was how much time was spent with the piss ants runnin’ ’round beneath him. We’re all for some human sideline stories for a sense of perspective, mind ya, but everytime a monster fight broke out, the filmmakers kept cuttin’ to folks tryin’ to survive the collateral damage. Let’s not kid ourselves here. We don’t buy tickets for an IMAX 3D experience watchin’ dirty face actors emote. We buy ’em to see larger than life CGI pixels beat the ever livin’ tar out of each other!
That said, we hurried to the theater earlier (minus Mandy, ’cause she didn’t wanna feel bad seein’ made-up animals whoop up on each other like it’s cock fightin’) and grabbed ourselves a front row seat to see just how much America improved on their last ’bout with Godzilla, and we were not disappointed to say the least! Here’s what we had to say in our R-Rated Review Blog:
GODZILLA: KING OF THE MONSTERS (2019)
When a scientist builds a fancy bird caller to yap it up with the world’s biggest critters, she manipulates them to wreck the planet in the name of cosmic balance. Things get out of hand, however, ’cause the three-headed dragon Ghidorah’s starts callin’ the shots, and it’s up to Godzilla and a monster stalkin’ organization to restore the natural order. Arguably the best Godzilla flick yet, it definitely blows the other two American attempts at capturin’ Japan’s biggest mon-star outta the water. Lotta kaiju brawlin’, epic globe trottin’, and a cast of root-worthy humans perfectly co-existin’ with impressive special effects exhibitin’ genuine girth. Godzilla vs Ghidorah vs Rodan vs Mothra, volcanic entrances, maybe the lost city of Atlantis, gift wrapped nukes, atomic booms, plane crashes, in-flight ejection meals, two miles worth of dead fish, stormy body odor, nuke beams, three-way dragon’s breath, regeneratin’ appendages, Fenway Park chaos, metamorphosis, wolves devourin’ a dead buck, King Kong references galore, history lesson wall art galore, submarine rescue missions, 3-4 background beasts of city stompin’ size, and Blue Oyster Cult’s tune is finally used in a Godzilla flick! 5/5!
We strongly recommend ya to see this on the biggest screen with the meanest surround sound you can find, Scream Freaks!
Other than that, be sure to catch up on all past Screaming Soup! Seasons, check out this week’s Howl’n Hottie, read recent reviews for the newer horror films and comics we’re checkin’ out in our blogs, R-Rated Reviews and Sequential Slime, and help us get the word out about the web’s #1 animated horror host show! Please use our social buttons in the upper right corner of the site and follow our tweets, subscribe to our video channels, like our Facebook, watch and share all our vids, and keep that fan mail comin’. You can also warm up some Screaming Soup! leftovers with reruns currently playin’ on Beta Max TV and Sluggo’s The Vortexx!
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