SPECIAL SCREAMING SOUP! MESSAGE FOR JOHN CARPENTER

Please play the video message below . . .

Thanks for taking the time to listen, and we can be reached at screamingsoup@gmail.com if you’re interested. The episode premiers 5/20/16, and we would need the recording by 5/10/16 at the latest.

Here is the script for the scene:

JCarpenter: I had to taste all the drinks to know which was mine, so you guys are going to have some backwash in yours.

Deadwest: Freaking John freaking Carpenter too?! What are you guys doing out here?

SCunningham: The Crosslands is a great place to scout for new talent for our films. We’re just using this haunted house prop for keeping a low profile so we’re not annoyed by lousy talents wanting a picture.

Deadwest: When’s the last time something like that happened?

JCarpenter: Remember Ghosts of Mars?

WCraven: I would like the pepperoni pizza I ordered please.

Deadwest: What’s all this fuss about pizza?

SCunningham: Our order you delivered, what do you think we’re talking about?

Deadwest: Pizza Shark? How could I be so freaking stupid! Duped into being some pizza parlor’s delivery boy like a chump. Look, I’m sorry about the pizza but can I talk shop with you about horror movies? Like what inspired you to be the superstars of horror that you are?

WCraven: I’m sorry to interrupt, but if you’ll excuse me, I guess I have to go find something else to eat.

SCunningham: My pizza’s getting cold, so I better go too.

Deadwest: But wait, I have so many questions. And my table-!

SCunningham: Just have your people call my people.

Deadwest: That was a waste of time. Come on Billy.

(Deadwest looks defeated and starts to walk away)

JCarpenter: Hey. Don’t you want your tip?

Deadwest: Tip? Sure, whatchu got fer me?

JCarpenter: This clown you mentioned . . . he’s giving you hell, huh?

Deadwest: That’s an understatement.

JCarpenter: You know, in my movie Starman, the message was about people at their best when things are at their worst.

Deadwest: I remember that. Pretty positive message.

JCarpenter: I only wish it were true.

Deadwest: So, what? I’m doomed to failure? Just saddle my bike and disappear into that ol’ moonset?

JCarpenter: No, I wouldn’t say that. No magic I know of will trump a book of the dead, copy or not, but when it comes to his monsters, maybe you should fight fire with a bigger fire.

Deadwest: A bigger fire?

JCarpenter: Here. Take this Tailhouse coupon and ask for this girl. She’ll hook you up with some of the meanest guys out there I’m sure will give you the edge.

Deadwest: Thanks partner!

JCarpenter: We horror fans gotta stick together. (exits)